To You...

This post is a very personal reflection with which hopefully you can connect.

Last month, a friend of mine passed away in a tragic accident. I remember being at work and receiving the news, not via phone call, but by text message... and Facebook... I had known her since we were 6 years old, and now, at the young age of 22, she was gone. For the record, we were just friends, always there for each other whenever we needed an ear. We had gone our separate ways in the beginning of high school, but over the years, we had kept in touch. We were supposed to have coffee earlier this summer, but I didn't wake up in time. I've never regretted anything more in my entire life.

I couldn't function, I didn't accomplish anything that day, I was paralyzed. Until then I had never cried over someone's death. I could never truly relate, I never really understood, until then. I finally understood that emptiness, that hollow feeling. For the next few days, I kept moving, purely out of the strength of my own will. I went to work, saw friends, lived my life, but with that empty hollow consuming me. I'm ok now... but it still feels weird. To be honest, when I pass her name in my address book I can't even bring myself to delete her number from my phone. But it's getting easier, every day, a little easier.

I'm not going to say something uplifting like "live your life to the fullest" or "love like you've never loved before," because that doesn't help anyone, it's just a band-aid phrase. What I will say is that all your pains, be it mental or emotional, get easier over time, but ONLY if you allow it. Take your time to grieve, I know I did, but you can't let the pain take over your life, because letting that paralysis consume you is equivalent to dying. No one (sane) would want you to stop your life because of them. Life doesn't stop for one person, but it will always accept you back.